Salt, Seed & Fertilizer Spreader Scoop

UPDATED! No, not really. It's the same scoop, but I just used it to spread a bunch of grass seed in my yard, and fertilizer in my garden, and turns out it works great for seeds and fertilizer, too! Huzzah!

Have you ever sampled the pavement beneath your feet and thought, ‘Wow, this really doesn't taste very good,’. Of course you have. Well I have good news. Your days of flavorless, frozen sidewalks are over. Introducing this Salt Spreader Scoop—a veritable condiment dispenser for your driveway. Oh, it also has the bonus effect of spreading your ice-melting chemicals evenly. Not that that really matters.

This Salt Spreader Scoop sports a 100mm diameter and holds around 2 cups of your favorite pavement spice—sodium chloride, calcium chloride, salt, ice-melt, granulated dreams of walking confidently up to your house at night without suffering a concussion, you name it. 36 perfectly spaced 6mm holes allow the spice to pass through so that you can avoid the nightmare of that awful little wrist flick that inevitably deposits uneven patches of savory goodness all over the place. Plus, a rotatable bottom cap lets you close off the holes so you're not wasting your driveway seasonings on areas that don't need it.

For those who appreciate both efficiency and structural integrity, the bottom cap simply snaps in place, which is why PETG is recommended at least for that piece, but PLA might be OK, too. I didn't try it. The entire model whips up in about four hours, or about two and a half hours if you use some fancy high flow PETG like I did. No supports needed, so you can get back to your main focus: elevating the taste of your driveway to the gourmet standard it deserves.

So go ahead, sprinkle your walkway with the flamboyant flair of a Michelin-star chef. It’s time to retire dull, flavorless concrete and welcome an era of delectable driveways. Oh and also, no more ice.